You May Never See Another Dog Blog From Me

How is it Wednesday? I have been busy. I promised myself a Monday blog just to keep things rolling in my tiny corner of cyberspace....ooops. No good writing today, just some thoughts.

My dog had to get put to sleep yesterday. I am not going to pretend to be any kind of a dog lover because you all know I am not, but Torrie was the best. I got her for Christmas when I was 15. I named her Torrie because when I was 15, I had all of my kids names picked out and my girl name (I was going to have 2 boys, a girl, and then another boy), was going to be Victoria but I was going to call her 'Torrie'. This explains something about my childhood. Yes, I was socially awkward. This does not explain something else. How was I not gay?

Well, with Torrie's passing I can't help but focus on 2 things: 1) Why get a dog when you know you will have to watch it die? 2) Something that tied me to being a 15 year old kid is gone. You know me. I can't NOT re-examine the past 15 years of my life.

Black labs live to be 10-12. Mine lived to be 15. I guess that makes me lucky. I don't feel better knowing that. I had forgotten how much I used to play with her back then. I bought my own dog food, paid for dog classes. I was a legit owner. Not bad for a kid. When I moved out a couple years later, I left her with my mom. She loved my mom the most, and will always be remembered as my mom's dog. But for me, she was my dog. We had 3 other dogs growing up. She was the only one I claimed.

15 years. Is that a long time? A short time? What did I do in her lifetime?

Firsts: real job, real girlfriend, real car, love & pain
Life: graduated HS, moved out, moved back, bought a house, graduated college, moved to Reno, got my masters, moved back, moved around, moved to Atlanta
Jobs: babysitter, computers, office furniture, cable, media buyer, advertising, IT start-up, sportswriter, radio/TV talent, non-profit development
Women: just kidding, but believe me, I know the list and I went through it.

If this was a real-time post, you would be wondering where I have been for the past hour. I have literally started putting actual dates to the significant events of the past 15 years of my life. How old was I when I bought my house? What actual year did start working there? I was going there, and doing that, when I was dating who? I got up to my college graduation before I decided I should finish this blog.

Obsession + lack of memory = a fun time digging away at the past. My resume' was a great guide. Throw in my school dates which I know, and it starts to take shape. For some reason I am good at remembering when I started and stopped dating girlfriends too.

I had actually planned on talking about a bunch of other stuff in here, but now I am out of time. Spent my whole lunch break on a stupid timeline (which I secretly love).

Oh well, I'll see what I can get to later in the week. Guess its fitting that Torrie get her own blog. When she was a puppy, I was a boy. Now she is gone, and I am a man. R.I.P. girl. You were a great dog.